Funny Life Quotes And Sayings

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Funny Life Quotes And Sayings Biography
Smile is the best thing a person can do, pleasant feelings and all the other good senses are arisen from it – here you are going to read the collection of the best funny quotes about life by famous people, enjoy funny sayings and if you like the page bookmark/share.

“I want to die like my grandfather, peacefully, in his sleep. Not screaming, like the passengers in his car.”
Author Unknown
“Mom and Dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I believe in. But every time I do, they tell me to stop it.”
Calvin
“I have opinions of my own — strong opinions — but I don’t always agree with them.”
George Bush
“Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.”
Homer Simpson
“It is better to be thought a fool, than to open one’s mouth and remove all doubt.”
Mark Twain Quotes
“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.”
Groucho Marx
“One out of four people is a Chinese. If your father, your mother and your brother are not Chinese, it must be you.”
Anonymous
“Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer.”
Anonymous
“Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.”
Anonymous
“Life is like a Ferrari, it goes too fast. But that’s ok, because you can’t afford it anyway.”
Jim Davis
“If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.”
George Carlin
“Women are like cell phones. They like to be held and talked to, but push the wrong button, and you’ll be disconnected.”
Unknown
“Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.”
Joey Adams
“In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away”
Shing Xiong
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
Dr. Seuss
“Everything has been figured out, except how to live.”
Jean-Paul Sartre
“Someday life will all make perfect sense, so laugh through the confusion smile through the tears, and keep reminding yourself everything happens for a reason.”
Anonymous
“Love me or leave me. Hey, where is everybody going?”
Anonymous
“Everyone should have at least two friends – one to talk to and one to talk about.”
Anonymous
“In the book of life, the answers aren’t in the back“
Charlie Brown
“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.”
Bob Hope – Happy Quotes
“Researchers have found that men are four times more likely to sleep naked than women are. Perhaps all that body hair keeps them too warm! Or maybe they just never got around to replacing their Batman pyjamas.”
Anonymous
Welcome to Seriously funny life quotes! Here is a really cool collection of the best, wittiest, funniest, stupidest, nastiest crankiest quotes and hilarious sayings, from people who would be happy to unquote the misquoted! Or you may hear them say, 'did I say that?' Enjoy these great quotes, both from the times gone by and from the current times; from the world of sports, Technology, Love, Life and perhaps from all walks of life for that matter. Please make sure to bookmark this page as it is constantly updated. Have fun, ROTFL, LOL and tweet it or facebook it for your friends! Seriously, have some fun!

Funny Life Quotes And Sayings